New Beginnings : Old Doubts

It’s a weird feeling to be excited and melancholy at the same time. I didn’t want this job, was even refusing to apply. Tiffany convinced me I should at least fill it out, stating that I might not get the job and I don’t have to accept the offer if I don’t want to. But how can you say no to such an opportunity? I grudgingly, hastily filled out the application. I thought my answers were sloppy, and off the mark, I was like, hey if I’m suppose to get the job then I will, my answers don’t really matter. Honestly, I hoped that I wouldn’t get the job, I was even prepared for the rejection email (and the justification of my speeding ticket to be the reason, certainly not an internal attribute). So it became clear that this is what God wanted me to do. I was rather bummed. This has nothing to do with my major, my qualifications, or even something I want to do. However an adventure is an adventure, and if this is what God wants then this is what I’m doing. Slowly I began to warm up to the idea and I’m almost to the point where I’m looking forward to going. :-P
So in two weeks I’ll board a plane to take me across the country (literally) where I’ll spend 2 weeks in LA and then travel across the U.S – and get paid to do so. Pretty awesome once in a lifetime opportunity right? However, I’ve been exposed to all the downsides of this arrangement. For 10 months I’ll be away from my family and friends. I’ll be in a hotel room creeping on facebook about the all the fun times
they’re having together. For 10 months I won’t have a ‘home’ I’ll be shuffled from one hotel to the next (I’ve definitely lost the appeal of hotels) for 10 months I wont experience home cooking. For 10 months I wont sleep in my own bed. For 10 months I’ll be on the road. I’ll be spending 10 months with the some person I don’t know, no breaks!

So yeah on the outside it looks pretty amazing, I’ll get to travel all over, and it is cool – but you don’t have to pack your stuff up every morning and spend hours on the road.



So I’m deciding to look on the bright side from now on. In two weeks I’ll leave everybody behind – I mean – in two weeks I’ll board a plane to take me to LA and I’ll meet a bunch of amazing people who are about to embark on they’re own 10 month journey. In two weeks I’ll meet my future roomie/copilot who I will experience America with. In two weeks I will develop skills as a techie. I will spend 10 months with an awesome woman of God. I will spend 10 months meeting tons of new people and new connections and learn their stories. For 10 month I will learn more about myself and about life. For 10 months I will have countless adventures.

Just realized – 2 WEEKS!!!! =O